The time back has reminded me of how friendly the people here are and how much they LOVE children. Just about everybody comments on the kids...it is really fascinating. The Saudis, Indians, Pakistanis, Sri Lankans, Filipinos...all are so incredibly, incredibly, in love with children, I have never experienced a place where person, after person, comments on, touches, asks if they can kiss, or otherwise SEES the kids. On the compound, however, I am a little weary. I am becoming increasingly skeptical about an environment in which children have so much freedom and seem for the most part to be raising themselves.
On our cul-de-sac there are 6 houses. In these 6 houses live at least 11 children. It could be more because I haven't really met two of the families yet. There are at least 4 nannies on our street. In general, the nannies are full-time/live-in nannies which pretty much means they work all day 6 days per week. Multiply all this by 50 and you pretty much have our compound. 300 homes, 550 children 150 nannies---conservatively.
Maybe because of the fact that we are walled in, parents seem to feel that their children are safer here than at home. I hear it quite frequently:
"Oh, it is such a safe place for children"
"We could never allow him/her to do at home what they can do here"
"He/she would never have the level of independence he/she has here"
So, much to my husband's dismay, I have started asking "why?"
It seems as though people believe that compound life in KSA is a safer environment than "home" for two main reasons. First the traffic, the independence of children is hampered by the amount of traffic back home. Second, risk of being "snatched", the independence of children is hampered by the risk of being kidnapped or worse back home.
I am not sure that this is really the case. At certain times of the day there are quite a few HUGE SUVs driving these streets and who is living in the compound but a bunch of random people from other countries? But more than this I am forced to ask myself: Are these the only dangers in the world for children? Is that the only job of a parent--making sure that kids don't get hit by cars or get kidnapped? And, what dangers are here that aren't present back home?
Increasingly, I am beginning to believe that the extent to which nannies are used to take care of children here is a ... danger. In an extreme and apparent class society, the nannies are little more than indentured servants. (And it seems as though many of the westerners here have forgotten where they come from and are perfectly comfortable in exploiting the balance of things.). Their job is not to raise children or help them learn valuable social lessons. Yet, here on compound, children spend the majority of their time with nannies.
I have seen children, pull the hair of, kick, hit and spit on nannies while the nannies laugh. I have seen children throw toys at babies while nannies sit and chat with each other. I have seen nannies ask children to behave while time and again the children don't listen. I have had children come home to us and ask for food when they have not been fed by their nanny. I have seen young children out wandering alone while groups of nannies congregate in the common area, etc, etc, etc
I am left wondering if living here is really much safer for children or if somehow people have been lulled into a false sense of security.
On our cul-de-sac there are 6 houses. In these 6 houses live at least 11 children. It could be more because I haven't really met two of the families yet. There are at least 4 nannies on our street. In general, the nannies are full-time/live-in nannies which pretty much means they work all day 6 days per week. Multiply all this by 50 and you pretty much have our compound. 300 homes, 550 children 150 nannies---conservatively.
Maybe because of the fact that we are walled in, parents seem to feel that their children are safer here than at home. I hear it quite frequently:
"Oh, it is such a safe place for children"
"We could never allow him/her to do at home what they can do here"
"He/she would never have the level of independence he/she has here"
So, much to my husband's dismay, I have started asking "why?"
It seems as though people believe that compound life in KSA is a safer environment than "home" for two main reasons. First the traffic, the independence of children is hampered by the amount of traffic back home. Second, risk of being "snatched", the independence of children is hampered by the risk of being kidnapped or worse back home.
I am not sure that this is really the case. At certain times of the day there are quite a few HUGE SUVs driving these streets and who is living in the compound but a bunch of random people from other countries? But more than this I am forced to ask myself: Are these the only dangers in the world for children? Is that the only job of a parent--making sure that kids don't get hit by cars or get kidnapped? And, what dangers are here that aren't present back home?
Increasingly, I am beginning to believe that the extent to which nannies are used to take care of children here is a ... danger. In an extreme and apparent class society, the nannies are little more than indentured servants. (And it seems as though many of the westerners here have forgotten where they come from and are perfectly comfortable in exploiting the balance of things.). Their job is not to raise children or help them learn valuable social lessons. Yet, here on compound, children spend the majority of their time with nannies.
I have seen children, pull the hair of, kick, hit and spit on nannies while the nannies laugh. I have seen children throw toys at babies while nannies sit and chat with each other. I have seen nannies ask children to behave while time and again the children don't listen. I have had children come home to us and ask for food when they have not been fed by their nanny. I have seen young children out wandering alone while groups of nannies congregate in the common area, etc, etc, etc
I am left wondering if living here is really much safer for children or if somehow people have been lulled into a false sense of security.
Or, maybe, I'm just too uptight.
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